No matter how healthy a couple's relationship is, some squabbles are definitely bound to happen. But mire frequent and serious arguments can definitely take a toll on the kids.
Children feel the most secure with their parents but harsh parental arguments can negatively affect a baby who is as young as six months of age and adults as old as 19 years can be very sensitive to their parents arguments.
How does fights effect children:
- Kids are emotionally insecure. Children exposed to a lot of fighting may worry about divorce or wonder when one parent’s silent treatment is going to end. It can make it difficult for them to have a sense of normalcy in the family since fights may be unpredictable.
- The parent-child relationship may be affected.
- Fighting creates a stressful environment. Overhearing frequent or intense fighting is stressful for kids. Stress can take a toll on their physical and psychological well-being and interfere with normal, healthy development.
- Decreased cognitive performance: its been researched that kids who come from a house where parents fight a lot often have difficulty with their attention span and also fond it difficult to focus. Their ability to rapidly solve problems and quickly see patterns in new information also decreases.
- Increased relationship problems: Being exposed to parents fighting increases the chances that kids will treat others with hostility. They may struggle to maintain healthy relationships when they’re older too.
- Higher rates of behavior problems: Parental conflict has been linked to increased aggression, delinquency, and conduct problems in children. Additionally, children are more likely to have social problems and increased difficulty in adjusting to school.
- Increased risk of eating disorders: Several studies have linked eating disorders, such as anorexia, to high parental discord.
- Physical effects: A child might even have physical effects from the fighting, such as sleep problems, stomach aches or headaches.
- Higher risk of academic problems: Other studies have found that living in a high conflict family increases the odds of dropping out of high school and getting poor grades.
- A more negative outlook on life: Children who are raised in high-conflict homes are more likely to have negative views of their family relationships. They are also more likely to view themselves in a negative way.
- When Does Fighting Become Problematic?
- Just because your fights don’t get physical doesn’t mean they aren’t harmful to your kids. It can be serious when :
- Name-calling starts
- Threats of abandonment (such as threatening to leave the house or divorce)
- Any form of physical aggression (including throwing things or punching things in anger)
- Walking out or withdrawing from the argument.
- You might take these steps to address the situation with your kids:
P. S - pic source : www.pixabay.com
If you believe that your fights with your spouse or partner are harming your child’s mental well-being, consider seeing a therapist.There is no harm in talking to a third person who can discuss your issues without judging or becoming biased.
- Discuss the fight.
- Reassure the children that it was just an argument and not indicative of bigger problems.
- Finish it up by making sure the children understand that you’re still a strong family.
- At the end of the day, what matters most is you love your family and you want to protect and stay connected.
- Must read another wonderful post on parenting.
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this is actually correct, I wish people do understand this thing before planning a kid.ReplyDelete
Hubby and I make it a point not to show anger or frustration in front of kids.ReplyDelete
This is so true and relatable to me. I got nothing but flashbacks. :(ReplyDelete
Its so relatable, I have been into such situations .ReplyDelete
Indeed! Fighting creates a stressful environment. We have been to in this situations many times. But we controlled now and we don't fight when our kids are around us.ReplyDelete
That's actually true. Fights and name-calling and insults definitely creates negativity.ReplyDelete
So well written.yes it's very important to not fight in front of the kids. It has adverse effect on a kids mindReplyDelete
Yes, even the smallest of comments can account to bullying and can have a dire consequences.ReplyDelete
It is found that even if there are no immediate obvious response in childrens behaviour due to disturbed home environment, often it crops up as psychological disorder in adulthood. It is impt to be careful.ReplyDelete
That's quite a well thought through post. Quarreling parents, definitely, are not the right influence on kids (and for that matter an adult). You have covered almost all the aspects of impact on the child, from perspectives of cognition to behaviour. A child witnessing constant parental fights is bound to grow emotionally weak and with an evasive tendency, which, for sure, is not going to help in the long run, especially when the child grows and plans to enter into a relationship. Nice food for thought :)ReplyDelete
That is a very apt post on a topic which most of us tend to ignore. Kids are like sponges and even the smallest thing in their environment can affect them. The idea of a family should be a happy one for a child as that should be their safe place and not a place which makes them insecure. parents need to be careful while talking or arguing in front of kids.ReplyDelete
I completely agree with you, parental conflicts affect a child's mental health so negatively. and kids develop emotional insecurity and other behavioral issues, if this thing happens repeatedly. i think, spouses should deal their conflict positively and should avoid doing it in front of kids. great post and you had covered all points well.ReplyDelete
This is a very sensitive and relative topic these days. Couples have to avoid confrintations in fornt of the kids if they dont want them to be scarred.ReplyDelete
You are so right. Little ones are the most affected when parents fight. You have also given sound advice to deal with the situation. Good post.ReplyDelete
Noor Anand Chawla
At times their fragile mind succumbs to the negativities that parents fight brings in. So, we resolve our fights through SMS rather being vocal.ReplyDelete
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